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Workaholics: What Makes Them Tick: Workaholics is caused by an internal set of mechanisms. It's triggered by a controlling parental figure who later becomes integrated as part of the adult's superego. At that point, it commands the internalized child within the adult:
Please me, hurry up, work hard, be perfect.
Society and the controlling parent reward the workaholic for this type of compulsive behavior. He's never rebellious. Instead, the workaholic is very goal-oriented and a high achiever. Teachers love him. Parents are pleased. Bosses couldn't be happier. His operating philosophy: I'll prove myself to them even if it kills me. The parental image within him continues to direct his behavior, and he obeys. The pleasurable side of workaholic's personality, the "up" side of life, is stifled and ignored.
Workaholics create a very stressful environment and have the health problems commonly associated with a pressured life-style. They tend not to respect themselves physically. They don't exercise or eat properly, making themselves prime candidates for heart attacks, hypertension, ulcers and other stress related diseases.
The workaholic is usually inefficient. He brings problems to a job, because he is driven rather than productively busy. The controlling parent in the workaholic won't give him permission to have fun, relax, play, or take care of his health.
Four grades of workaholics (four is the most compulsive personality):
Grade four: This is a type A personality.* He is grandiose, verging on manic.
Grade three: Constantly expresses self-doubt. Example: Why didn't I go to my daughter's graduation? He begins to question the value system learned from the controlling parent. He listens intently to other's complaints about himself.
Grade two: Always in conflict. He recognizes that compulsive behavior is wrong, but is always pulled between opposite poles. Example: He wonders whether or not to answer the phone while engaged in a pleasurable activity.
Grade one: He can't say no at work. He tends to be exploited until he learns to stand up for his rights.
Bottom line: Workaholics must learn to give themselves permission to live as well as to win.